Top Ten Reasons NOT to Take your Toddler to your Obstetrician Appointment

1.) The fish tank in the waiting room only occupies a toddler’s interest for 33.5 seconds.

2.) Baggies of Goldfish crackers are sometimes emptied out onto the waiting room carpet and stomped upon by size four and a half shoes.

3.) Trying to eat to settle your stomach, while feeding your hungry child, chasing your hungry child, calming the tantrum, filling-out your stack of paper work, and paying your co-pay all at the same time is problematic.

4.) Being interrupted with your eating, feeding, chasing, calming, writing, and paying by a page from the nurse informing the waiting room that there is a black corolla in the parking lot with its lights on is also a little thorny. (I was wondering why my car was buzzing after Doug had pushed a few mystery buttons as I was getting my purse off the front seat.)

5.) Stepping on the scale while holding a 20-something pound one-year-old, who is kicking, doesn’t accurately gauge your weight gain.

6.) Stirrups.

7.) There are easily accessible trash cans labeled “Bio-hazard.”

8.) Drawers filled with pre-sterilized stainless-steel instruments (eh-hem) are not supposed to be touched by sticky curious fingers.

9.) Chasing your toddler around the room without your pants on is...drafty.

10.) If nothing else because it gives you the feeling “what on earth was I thinking creating ANOTHER one of these!”