Wednesday, April 30, 2008

A Blog About Hormones. Ohhh, This Should Be Fun.

Basically, us women can blame almost anything on hormones and get away with it.

-Ate a whole jar of nutella in two minutes? pregnant

-Zits the size of radishes? that time of the month

-A bit overzealous? ovulating

-Using questionable adjectives? PMS

-Toots? bloated

If anyone inquires about our odd behavior, all we have to do is point smugly at a calendar and *Bingo* we are UNTOUCHABLE. Hormones are the end-all be all of excuses.

Now that I’m in lactation mode, I’m not sure I have excuse. I’m not pregnant and my body wouldn’t let me get that way even if I wanted to. No cycle, no hormonal eruptions, right?

Last week I was watching Oprah and the Jonas Brothers were on. For those of you who are no longer in the training bra stage of life, let me explain who the Jonas Brothers are. They are the 21st century equivalent of Hansen: three girly-looking teenage brothers with exceptionally bad hair and a following of teeny bopper fans that would make even N’Sync blush (Oprah likened the Jonas Brothers to the Beatles, which I thought was sacrilegious).

Now, I’ve never heard their music and don’t care to (too cool to care), but I do watch Oprah while folding the laundry, and being that they were her featured guests, I watched politely.

On the show, the Jonas Brothers invited two of their “biggest fans” onto the stage with them. The girls were screaming, giggling, weeping, and bouncing, as only thirteen year-old-girls could.

And I sat there, folding socks… and weeping uncontrollably myself. And not just a little. Salty tears and liquid boogers streamed down my face. I was so happy for these girls. I was so touched by the Jonas Brother’s humanity. I was so moved by Oprah for facilitating this event.

Please tell me it was hormones! Please tell me I’m not crazy! Please excuse my weird behavior!

But most of all, please don’t make me listen to the Jonas Brothers sing!

Have you ever done anything odd under the influence (of hormones)?


Melanie said...

One of my roommates once reported that she had cried that day because the guy at Subway put mustard on her sandwich.

Dana said...

I weaped as I watched the season finale of Power Rangers Operation Overdrive with Jett...The Red Ranger found out that he was acutally a Robot, then he sacrificed himself for the team. In the end a spell was cast on him that made him a real boy...Modern Day Pinnochio!


Cried like a baby!

I was able to laugh at myself later on...

birdbabies said...

I'm loving the Hansen true! I once lost my cool at my then-fiance-now-incredible-husband when trying to find a parking spot. He pointed out a perfect parking spot as I passed by it on accident.I then turned to him, blurted out, " I KNOW!" and then began to sob! (I had just started birth control). I swear our hormones are just trying to make us look crazy.

Jer and Jealin said...

You are too funny! I love it and you're right, that is sacrelige. Beatles my butt.

Wow so many crying moments. I stepped on Jer's toe once and bawled my eyes out. Once when I was prego, I ordered something at a restaurant that was not good and started to cry. I was SO embarassed. Also have you seen 'Bridge to Terabithia'? We saw it in the theater while I was prego. I was out of control crying. Snorting and all. I think the little girls in front of us were scared.

BTW when you can't use hormones, try the 'chemical's are out of whack' excuse. It's gotten me out of some tight spots!

Tris said...

I cry at the end of virtually every kids movie; when the princess kisses the prince, when the kid punches the bully, and especially when the dog comes home. I don't know why I do this, but I usually blame it on hormones.

A weird note on the Jonas Brothers, I read something online about them and it pointed out how insanely tight their pants always are, I hadn't payed any attention before I read that but now, seriously, anytime I see them, their pants look like they borrowed them from their little sister. Gross.

Anonymous said...

Hello. And Bye.